Dear Amber Tamblyn,
We are big fans of you here at GFY HQ. You’re so cute! You’re not a bobblehead! You’re a pretty good little actress! Your Dad was awesome in Twin Peaks, and also clearly knows his way around both a switchblade AND a fan kick, thanks to his work in West Side Story, and God knows, we have no beef with genes like that. Finally, you clearly respect the power of properly fitting trousers, as saluted in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, a movie that absolutely did not make any of us cry, not once.
However.  This is a problem:


[Photo courtesy of Daily Celeb]
Tragically, it gets worse:



[Photo courtesy of Daily Celeb]
What? That is just bizarre. I mean, first of all, would it have killed you to wear black boots, if you had to do that Jeans Tucked Into Boots thing that all the kids are doing nowadays, despite the fact that it’s killing us? But most of all, kiddo, that shirt is just….weird. I think with black pants or a black pencil skirt, it could have worked — you could pull off the high-waisted look okay.  But it just looks weird over your old, kick-back, relaxed-wash Levi’s. The proportions are freaky, and the jeans are way too casual for the top. It’s just…it’s really just perplexing. And is that a….zipper? Or something? All the way from your navel to your, you know, personal lady areas? Because that just looks….weird. Or is….oh my God. I thought the black band-thingie — you know, that salute to Au Coton you’ve got on — was part of your SHIRT, but could it be part of your JEANS? Or even, god forbid, just a crazy belt-type apparatus?
Listen, you’re totally freaking me. I can’t figure out what the hell is going on here. I’m just going to look away now.